I know that it’s 2009 and I’m supposed to be really excited about everything going on . . . and I am . . . but there’s a lot of sadness around these parts lately. First, a friend’s mom died from cancer (too young, in my opinion), so my heart obviously goes out to that family.

Also, we had to put my doggie to sleep last weekend. I say we, even though it wasn’t really my decision to make. I actually told everyone that I (quote) “wanted no part in the decision.”

The condensed version of the story is that we got Trixie (a miniature dachshund) when I was in college. My mom and I shared her. She was *so* much fun. She was tiny as a puppy and had *such* an amazing spirit. There was no such thing as a stranger: she was happy to see everyone. She would run around the house like a maniac, especially after she had a bath.

After I got married, Trixie came to live with me. She stayed by my side as I suffered through three straight months of morning sickness, resting in my lap during the day and sleeping under the covers at my feet at night. When my little girl was born, Trixie would snuggle up against her, and would lick her little baby toes.

Not long afterwards, though, Trixie had a back injury (which is common in miniature dachshunds) and could no longer move her back legs. Surgery wasn’t a guarantee, and too expensive, so we tried alternative treatments, like exercise and acupuncture. She was able to gain some movement back, but was never able to hold her weight to stand. We invested in some doggie wheels, so the last three years of her life she was able to roll around the yard. Most recently, she was living with my mom because she had more resources to take care of her, but this past year was really hard. Trixie was sick a lot and having problems off and on. She was getting older and more lethargic; losing her sight and some of her hearing, and so it was decided that it was time to have her put to sleep.

Anyway, I know there are *more important* issues going on in the world: people losing family members, war, famine, poverty . . . but Trixie was my first dog, and I miss her. The fact that it was the “right decision” doesn’t make it any easier.

They say owners look like their dogs, and that is *so* true, because Trixie and I both had long, lean bodies, and long, skinny noses (though Trixie’s was cute, and mine is not, and if I wasn’t so afraid of unnecessary pain I would invest in rhinoplasty).

Anyway, if you read the author bio in One Wish, you will learn that I live in NC with my husband, little girl, and miniature dachshund, but that’s not true anymore. I know there’s not much to be done about the situation at this point, except announce to the blogosphere that I was lucky enough to have the *best* dog ever, and I’ll never forget my Trixie Pepperduke.